Making the tough calls

Very few people value confrontation.

It is extremely valuable.


Do you remember the last time you had a confrontation with another human being that could be viewed as negative? Surely you do, it’s impossible to live life without some type of friction. Maybe it was at work, a simple disagreement with a colleague. At school, a simple disagreement with your child’s teacher or another parent. Anything along those lines, try to remember how it made you feel when that conflict was over and settled.


I will hazard a quick guess on how it made you feel. Try to be honest with yourself…




If you had something looming over your life and that confrontation happened, no matter if it ended in your favor, just having the weight removed from your shoulders should feel great! I’m not saying that confrontation should be sought out or viewed as fun. But it should be viewed as VALUABLE.


Why is it valuable?

BECAUSE nobody likes the hard stuff.


It’s really that simple, I run across it all the time in the business world and have only recently started to pay attention to this fact. And believe me when I tell you that it is a FACT, hardly anybody likes to “ruffle feathers”. People, in large part, get through the day by attempting to “stay in their lane” and not cause conflict.


Soooooo….. Conflict causing is good?




Causing conflict on its own isn’t valuable, that much should be obvious. But what the fear people create in their mind to not cause conflict does to them, that is the enemy we have located. It is easy to be so worried about what might happen that you never try, or when you do make an effort it’s so half-hearted that it may as well have been no effort at all.



Always ask the question confidently. You WILL miss 100% of the swings you don’t take as the saying goes. It’s a certainty.


Certainty is comfortable, it’s easy, it’s going with the grain. That is why we need less of it if massive success is the goal. I have personally made well in excess of 6 figures just doing things that other people didn’t think were possible. I’m not talking about walking on water, just business deals that on the surface were EXTREMELY complicated. You would have to PUSH hard to get them done, and I did. Many MANY feathers had to be ruffled, not in a bad way, it just requires pushing and pushing – a level of effort that most people would walk away from.


I’m not making this up, it’s real-life experience. I don’t mean that people are scared of these deals, they just aren’t EASY. Nobody yelled at me in any of these cases, I just had to ask several questions that start out uncomfortable.



Me: I know this doesn’t fit your typical client profile, but here is why this business deserves a shot….

Company: We have never done that class of business before, it’s just not something we do.

Me: I understand, but who made that policy? Can I speak with them.

Company: Ummm…. I believe “Jim” made it about 10 years ago. I would ask him for an exception but I don’t want to upset him. He is very set in his ways.

Me: I understand, it’s not my goal to upset Jim either. I just want the chance to explain to him why this business will be profitable for his company. Jim doesn’t hate money, does he? If so, I’ll give up now.

Company: (Loud laughter) Nooooo, Jim loves money – he is always looking for new ways to grow the companies bottom line.

Me: That’s perfect, put me through to Jim and I’ll show a quick path to do just that. If he tells me he hates money, and want’s to make no more, I’ll tell him he’s free to hang up on me anytime during the call and I won’t bother him again.

Company: Fair enough, you really don’t take no for answer do you?

Me: I will gladly take no, just usually not the first, second, or third one.

Company: I’m putting you through to Jim now, good luck.

Me: Thank you! You won’t regret it.


That is, of course, an extreme example for understanding purposes but it isn’t far from the truth.

Embrace the confrontation in life, be bold, don’t build up demons in a situation that don’t exist. Remember the value you provide and treat each interaction and situation accordingly





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